Friday, September 19, 2008

The Can of Ass Whuppin!

(See the update below)

My golfing buddy, Boz, seems to have a poor memory
- he got on a roll and beat me a few times in a row. I must have been sick or something. Now, he is delusional and says it was 8 times in a row.....NO WAY!

He also doesn't want to remember - how many times I have whipped him in between when we can only play 9 holes during the week.

He also doesn't recall - the time I put the Can of Ass Whuppin on him about 5 times in a row.

As Mark Twain said - "the faintest ink is better than the sharpest memory." We will now have to keep track right here. Yes, dear readers, you will get the blow by blow of just who got the whuppin, the date, the number of holes, etc. You will also see a history much like the way I kept the Ol Nutter Almanac.

THE ARCHIVE (catch all of the past matches right here)

The Beating Continues
9/20/2008...18 Holes - Nutster whups on Boz 4 and 3. The Humane Society
was called in. Nutster even took four to get down on the eighth hole which featured missing a ridiculously short put in an effort to bring Boz back into the game. Even with very mediocre play on the backside, Nutster sent Boz packin on the 15th green. Boz is going to need to up his game or he is going to be sent down to the minor leagues to practice and earn his Nutster Tour Card back. How long can this continue? (Hint: A Long Time)

A Royal Ass Whuppin...Again
9/20/2008....18 Holes - Nutster destroys Boz 5 and 4. Nutster found himself 2 down after 7 holes. He then rallied with a par, par, par, bogey, par, par, par onslaught that left Boz talking to himself. Boz had a big string of double bogeys but, even if he had been on game, he would have found himself down after that kind of blitzkrieg from the BLACK (all the way back) tees. Nutster started slow with 7 five's to start which included 2 double bogeys to put himself in a hole.....a hole he didn't just dig himself out of....he vaulted. Those back tees are back there. We are talking PGA Tour length!

Nutster A Rock Under Pressure
9/19/2008...18 Holes - Nutster whups on Boz 1 up. Today's match was way too close. I had three double bogeys which, in match play, is like wrapping a Christmas present for your opponent. Boz didn't return the favor......until the very last hole with the match all tied. We were both in the middle of the fairway. Boz played it conservative off the tee with the 3 wood. Nutster took the chance with the driver. The conservative play left a 5 iron in Boz's hands versus an 8 iron for Nutster. Then, with the entire match riding on one shot, Boz proceeded to shank the ball straight right into the hazard. Pressure? Who can say but he hadn't hit a shot like that all day.

An Ass Whuppin
9/14/2008....18 Holes - Nutster whups on Boz 5 and 4. For those of you new to match play golf, this means he was down by 5 holes with 4 to go....that is a severe whuppin. I played like crap....I think I shot an 84. Now, to be fair, I think I recall getting beat up by Boz 7 and 6 on a day where he played his best and I played my worst. I mention this so you can see how bad the whuppin can be. 2 and 1 is close....3 and 2 is starting to get lopsided. 1 up means it got decided on the last hole.

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