HappyUP!!! Day 307

HappyUP!!! - errands
Why it happened - I took the day off
Why it makes me happy - when you are single, dropping off the car can be a pain....especially if the mechanic is in an out of the way place. My nephew and I were running an errand so we worked in getting the car dropped off.
I also took care of another little thing that went much faster than I thought it would....plus, I had gotten some bad information which led me to believe that I didn't have to take this step....WRONG!

HappyUP!!! - visitors
Why it happened - preparing for the celebration of life for my dad
Why it makes me happy - these people stopped by today because they are going to be out of town tomorrow. This couple have known my dad for 40 yrs or so. It sure was good to see them. They were also part of the contingent that would stop by while he was ill.

HappyUP!!! - time with my nephew
Why it happened - I am helping him with his house
Why it makes me happy - I dig hanging out with either of my nephews. I just don't get the opportunity to do it that often. It's great when I can.

HappyUP!!! Day 306

HappyUP!!! - call from a friend in Oregon
Why it happened - he was stuck in traffic
Why it made me happy - I hadn't talked to this guy in a long time. We are kindred spirits. We had a great time catching up. We definitely committed to playing golf at a great course up his way. He's picking the date and I am just going to show up

HappyUP!!! - time with my nephew and brother
Why it happened - I took some time off work
Why it made me happy - we did a little work on my nephew's house...his first house. Just us three guys
hanging out

HappyUP!!! - time with my sis-in-law
Why it happened - we were cleaning up my dad's effects
Why it made me happy - we found some cool photos. I was able to help them get their house back in order. We went shopping for libations for our houseguests this Saturday.

HappyUP!!! Day 305

HappyUP!!! - more e-mails coming in
Why it happened - people are finding out about my Dad's passing
Why it makes me happy - people are being moved by the story that ran in the Bee. It's an honor to him.

HappyUP!!! - Pride and Joy
Why it happened - in honor of my dad
Why it makes me happy - my dad used to do this corny thing. People would show pictures of their kids. He would then say, "do you want to see my Pride and Joy?" He would then whip out a picture of the wax and detergent of the same name. We had seen the schtick so many times that we would always go, "ugh....he's found another victim." It always made people laugh, though. Now that he is gone, I couldn't resist picking up the tradition and doing it a few times.

HappyUP!!! - travels were smooth
Why it happened - I had to get back from LA
Why it makes me happy - it's always great to get back home.....especially right now.

HappyUP!!! Day 304

HappyUP!!! - a peer liked the idea of HappyUP
Why it happened - I mentioned it in the meetings that I am at
Why it makes me happy - I use the HappyUP!!! concept a little differently at work. I try to catch my employees when they do something that makes me happy and I call it a HappyUP!!! When I mentioned
this concept in a breakout session, my peer brought it up in front of the entire group because he really
liked what I was doing. He may use it himself....HappyUP!!! spreads.

HappyUP!!! - feature story on my dad
Why it happened - the people at the Sacramento Bee read the obituary we submitted and wanted to do a full
story
Why it makes me happy - there aren't many people that actually get the featured obituary. There are a lot of reasons this makes me happy and they will get a post all of their own. In the meantime, you can see the story here.

HappyUP!!! - my presentation
Why it happened - I was at training meetings
Why it made me happy - by bosses boss came in when I was doing my second round. He knows that I am good at doing presentations. These presentations were more about public speaking practice and not content. It's a long story but I was very thankful that I didn't step on my tongue with this person in the room.

HappyUP!!! Day 303

HappyUP!!! - a client's comment
Why it happened - I was at a meeting
Why it made me happy - this client has a dry sense of humor. He also commands a lot of respect. This provides for an interesting dynamic. All of a sudden, he will say something that you just don't see coming
because of his position.....and it provides that comedic twist that makes something very funny. I think it was
a good thing that I wasn't mid-sip on my coffee.....I may have spattered those around me.

HappyUP!!! - e-mails from a friend
Why it happened - I e-mailed him some heartfelt thank you's
Why it made me happy - my thank you made him feel as good as what he provided for me. The ultimate win-win.

HappyUP!!! - plane ride
Why it happened - I was on the flight with a co-worker that I don't usually get to spend much time with
Why it made me happy - the entire hour in the air.....and the 30 minute white knuckle cab ride....was sprinkled with just this side of appropriate humor.

Bonus HappyUP!!! - dinner
Why it happened - we stumbled across our big boss at the bar
Why it made me happy - we had a lot of laughs and got some higher level business discussion in. Fun and
productive.

HappyUP!!! Day 302

HappyUP!!! - takeout food
Why it happened - the family had an unexpected gathering
Why it made me happy - it was a day of comfort eating. Bucca De Beppo and the Roseville
Gourmet put together some awesome spreads that helped ease a little bit of the pain of
the day.

HappyUP!!! - friends
Why it happened - they heard about the event
Why it made me happy - every time I had to go over the news, it made me cry. Not too much
HappyUP!!! about the tears but happy to have the right people at the right places.

HappyUP!!! - Dad left with little pain
Why it happened - it was his time
Why it made me happy - I got to see him yesterday. His passing was not expected this soon
but it couldn't have come soon enough. He didn't suffer nearly as much as we feared that he
would. He can now be reunited with his wife of 53 years, my mother, who left almost to the
day 6 years ago.

HappyUP!!! Day 301

HappyUP!!! - a live chat with an old friend
Why it happened - I called into his radio show
Why it made me happy - I hadn't talked to Dr Mitch in years. He has a radio show on Saturdays out of Los Angeles. I tuned in a couple of times earlier in the year. For whatever reason, he came to mind today. He was doing his live broadcast which you can pull down through the computer. His show was about "what you are thankful for." He was just talking about men that flew in B-17's in WW2. I called in under my first name from Roseville. I told him I was thankful for my dad and his heroics in WW2 flying...and getting shot down...in one of those B-17's. At the end of the call, I said, "great talking to you, Mitch." He replied, "Nutster, thanks for calling in." He had figured out it was me! That was fun.

HappyUP!!! - visiting my dad
Why it happened - he is getting respite care this weekend
Why it made me happy - who is kidding who? There isn't a lot to be happy about when it comes to his failing condition. This is a weekend when the hospice workers get a respite so he was moved to a facility for the weekend. He wasn't saying much today. There was no chair. I laid down next to him. He was asleep with his head back and eyes and mouth open. I reached down and put my hands on top of his hand. He smiled and mumbled, "that feels good." Lunch came and I helped to feed him. I did something for him.....that was a HappyUP!!! amidst the decline.

HappyUP!!! - Dr Mitch's program
Why it happened - I thought about his show today
Why it made me happy - I listened to a podcast in the background while I was doing some other things today.
His p-cast gave me this post. It's a very insightful thing to hear....and, hopefully, learn....and teach.

Chicks, Dudes, and the Difference

I was doing a little web surfing this morning - and decided to trip upon my old friend, Dr J. Mitchell Perry, and his radio show. I was delighted to find that he is doing podcasts of some of his weekly programs.

As many of you know - the Nutster has been single for quite some time. I have spent a lot of time thinking about why this is. I did not say that I spent time lamenting. I said, THINKING!

Newsflash - there is nothing "wrong" with being single. Society does it's best to make single people feel like there is. There is not. Here is the fact: you can be single. You can be in relationship. That's it.....that's all there is.

As I look over the fence - and see the relationship side, I see a lot of really green grass. There is companionship. There is a remedy for those times when solitude can drift to loneliness. Many singles
stop right there.

As usual, I go a step further - I allow my glance to travel across the barb wire and inspect the flora that is growing under my own feet.........and it looks pretty darn green too.

"Oh Nutster, you are just another guy that can't commit" - I can hear you already........m'am. As I have conjured upon this topic, I would say there are times when I would say this is a possibility. The think that I couldn't commit to was that that was the reason!

Dr Mitch, on his podcast, Fix it in Five and Tune it in Ten - (find it here...JM Perry Products ), brilliantly encapsulates many of the dynamics of a male/female personal relationship. He captures many of the things that have crossed my mind.......and adds a few along with a brilliant cherry on top.

What She Wants from Him

1. Listen (that means SHUT UP!)
2. Pay attention to me and BE with me
3. Empathize (Quit giving me advice and fixing it)
4. Hold me...Cherish me....show me I'm the one ("...and quit reaching for my area." )

What He Wants Her

1. Look Good
2. Pay attention and DO things with me
3. Sexual Gymnastics - Quantity and Quality (yes, screaming like a banshee is included)
4. Treat me like a King

Dr. Mitch goes over this list in seminars. He gets wild agreement from both sides of the gender that this is, in fact, what they want. He then goes to the men, "What do you think? Can you do what the other side wants?"

The men respond with, "I may not be very good at it but I am willing to try."

The women have a different spin. They come back with, "NO!" or, "Yes, but..............."

...................and this is why I am single.

HappyUP!!! Day 300

Let's strike up the band! - 3 laps around the track and we begin lap 4!

300 Days of HappyUP!!!'s on the books - let's point out just a few of today's highlights. Well, you all know the drill. It's not about a few....it's 3.

HappyUP!!! - indoor golf
Why it happened - I heard about it and acted
Why it makes me happy - a new closeby venue that can tell me a lot about my golf swing. Instant computerized
feedback told me a lot. It also neat to know that I could go there late at night as well.....or on a midday break from the office

HappyUP!!! - holiday e-mails from friends
Why it happened - it was the holiday
Why it makes me happy - this is one thing about e-mail is it makes it easy to connect with people that you
wouldn't have sent a card to or vice versa. You get to hear about what they are up to. It's good to keep track of you circle...even those on the outer rings.

HappyUP!!! - a hard mile
Why it happened - it was time for an assessment
Why it makes me happy - I did it. It wasn't going well but I gutted it out and did the best that I could
The results? See below post....not a HappyUP!!! Hey, it's about the experience.

Back to the Track - Assessment Day

This may look like a pretty scene to you - late fall...football season over. The cheerleaders have moved their pom poms indoors. Football players have created stories that some of them will still be telling 50 years from now.

For me - it was the look of an accident waiting for a place to happen. There was a strong likelihood that a horror story was about to take place.

Some of you may have remembered my last trip here- yes, it was back in June. I do an assessment of my health on this track. It had been 5 months and not a lot of consistent excercise since then. I figure that if I measure how fast I can get around this puppy four times every once in awhile, it should give me an idea of how my fitness is. Back in June, it was 7:07...Seven Minutes and seven seconds. I was probably about 5 pounds heavier back in June.

My first trip to this track was in February - 6:59 seconds to get around 4 times. I was weighing about what I do now. Yes, the amount of weight you are pulling along does effect your time.

Today, I had a feeling it was going to be tough - 7:37.....for one mile. Ouch! A far cry from 26.2 of these back to back at 6 minutes a mile. Of course, that was 23 years and 30 pounds ago....it was another lifetime.

Why do I still think back to then? - it's a new day. I am a 48 year old guy that can break 8 minutes for a mile. It is what it is. When I was 47, I broke the seven minute mark. I just need to do that again before next August when I turn 49.

...and, in the meantime, - hope that I don't cough up a lung! No, I'm not sick.....that run put some strain on the pipes!

HappyUP!!! Day 299

HappyUP!!! - laughter
Why it happened - Thanksgiving Dinner
Why it made me happy - I don't even remember what it was. I was at my best friend's parents house for dinner. My best friend, his brother and myself were left at the dining room table. Somebody said something and another one of us said something else and we were all laughing that laugh that you can't stop....even though it hurts.
CAUTION: this is dangerous on a turkey laden stomach!

HappyUP!!! - flowers
Why it happened - my best friend tipped me off
Why it made me happy - I took my best friend's mom some flowers for Thanksgiving. I probably wouldn't have thought of that. I had asked my best friend what I could bring to the feast. "Just bring yourself," he said. He happened to be at the store when we talked. "Hey, I just saw someone with flowers. It looked nice. That would be a good idea." As usual, the flowers were well received.

HappyUP!!! - guitar playing
Why it happened - a lazy morning
Why it made me happy - I really dig holiday mornings when you don't have anything planned....anything that you really should be doing. I did some serious noodling until the fingers were a little sore....it's one of the best sorenesses there is.

SuperHappyUP!!! - dinner......but that will get a posting all of it's own.

Tonight Was Weird

An old friend called me - I was just leaving work. We talked as I drove home. I got to my house. The conversation drifted to the day that it was.

Thanksgiving Eve - my friend asked if I was OK. I said that I was. My friend knew what Thanksgiving Eve will always be marked as for me. As I said that, I looked at the clock. It was 5:02 pm.

"It's exactly 6 years to the minute," - I told my friend, "since I last saw my mother alive."

Thanksgiving sometimes falls early - sometimes it falls late. This time, the date of Thanksgiving Eve coincided exactly with the date that my mother passed. I had stopped by to visit on my way home. I told my parents that I had to run an errand and then stop by my house. I said that I would be back in an hour.

45 minutes later - my dad was calling me to tell me that the paramedics had arrived and that my mom didn't look good.

I dropped everything and rushed the mile over to my parents house - all the emergency vehicles were there ...and my mother was being wheeled out. My dad was right. She looked so pale.

We didn't know for sure - while we waited at the hospital. I think that we both suspected...my dad and I. We didn't entertain the thought. After getting the news, we were allowed a final visit.

People get squeamish - at the thought of dead bodies. I know that did....and still do. Any discomfort goes away when it is your own mother. I stroked her hair. I kissed her forehead. I told her what a good mom she was.

....and now here I am - the date and the eve of Thanksgiving were aligned for the first time since my mom passed. It was the same time as the last time that I saw her.

I guess it was good that I was talking to my friend - I am not sure I would have looked at the clock. Of course, it didn't give me a private moment but I didn't really need one. Time is just a creation of man. The exact moment is really just a coincidence. The memory lives on. Thanksgiving Eve will always be a special time for me.

It was the last conversation - and the final kiss and a farewell parting of the hair.

HappyUP!!! Day 298

HappyUP!!! - an easy fix
Why it happened - I made a "per chance" phone call
Why it makes me happy - I called to ask for a favor to delay the solving of a problem. This would have allowed us to at least move forward with the project while a key issue was being worked out. In so doing, the person that I called knew something I didn't and removed the impediment totally. Too easy!

HappyUP!!! - haircut
Why it happened - I was due
Why it makes me happy - I didn't get the regular barber. I got the new guy. I was a little nervous because I have big meetings next week and my haircut is a little edgy. I am not picky about my hair....I just couldn't have it looking stupid. Plus, because I took the new guy, I got done a lot faster because 4 guys were waiting for my regular barber.

HappyUP!!! - dinner with a friend
Why it happened - my friend gave me a call
Why it makes me happy - we hadn't seen each other or talked at length for some time. It's always good to do
some visiting with a friend face to face.

HappyUP!!! Day 297

HappyUP!!! - time with a friend and long time employee
Why it happened - ad hoc conversations occur
Why it makes me happy - it is just one of those times when you one can have a needed
candid conversation. Tough subjects discussed but done in a way of help.

HappyUP!!! - call from a recruit
Why it happened - the person called me unexpectedly
Why it makes me happy - while I would like the person to work for us now, it is a
process. As long as the call keeps coming inbound, we are still on track

HappyUP!!! - Toastmasters
Why it happened - it was Tuesday
Why it makes me happy - we were short on attendance due to the holiday...very
short. BUT we all agreed we were long on quality!

HappyUP!!! Day 296

HappyUP!!! - morning time
Why it happened - I got up early
Why it made me happy - I got in some reading before I went to work. I actually looked at the clock after I had been up for awhile and said, "oh, I have another 45 minutes before I need to get ready for work." Relaxing.

HappyUP!!! - meeting time
Why it happened - I visited with one of my managers today
Why it made me happy - I got to see her in action.....and it was good.

HappyUP!!! - a steak
Why it happened - I bought it Sat night
Why it made me happy - it had tenderized for two days with the Worchester.....delicious after a few minutes over the grill.

HappyUP!!! Day 295

HappyUP!!! - trading e-mails with an acquaintance
Why it happened - the acquaintance was going through a tough time
Why it makes me happy - I think the person appreciated my overture of caring. While what I e-mailed was nice and one could say, "Nutster, what a nice guy," always remember that we are all selfish. While it was a nice thing, at the end of the day, it made me feel good to send the message. Selfishness can be a good thing.

HappyUP!!! - ran across an old friend
Why it happened - I had to work for a bit today at an auction
Why it makes me happy - it was good to catch up. It had been years since I had seen this person. We just shot the breeze and enjoyed each other's company.

HappyUP!!! - weigh in
Why it happened - it happens every Sunday
Why it makes me happy - I was only up 2 pounds. Only???? My trip out of town this week could have (should have) been disastrous on my waistline. It could have been much worse. It's time to knuckle down for a few days before Thanksgiving

A Place At The Table (Rerun)

(I posted this last year....I could just do a hyperlink. It didn't seem right. Here is the original article in it's entirety to begin to put you in the holiday mode)


Thanksgiving? - yes, it's called that. To the long-winded, I suppose it could be called Thanksforthereceiving...

....and there is no one in need to be more thankful - than the guy writing this post.

I come from an average size family - but, along the way, I lost my mom and a brother. This cuts it down to just my elderly father, my brother and sister-in-law, and me.

This Thanksforthereceiving - saw my brother and father travelling to be with my sister-in-law's family for the holiday. She has a great family and I am thrilled that she and my brother take such good care of pops on a daily basis....even taking him to be around lots of people on a day like this. Dad likes that.

So, the Nutster was left all alone - but, being a bit of an introvert, it really wasn't going to be that big of a deal. It's not like the ol waistline needed a day of gluttony....plus, there was plenty of painting to do around the homestead.

But, I got the invitation that I couldn't ignore - even though I never committed to showing up....a real social faux paus.

My best friend of 33 years - invited me to go to his parents house and be with his family on Turkey Day.

I finished slapping a coat of latex on a baseboard - and said, "doggone it, Scott, get your fanny out of here and over to their house."

...and, when I arrived, my best friend's mother grabbed my arm - and took me into the dining room. She said, "look.....here is a place at the table for you with your name on it. We didn't know for sure if you were coming but we were sure hoping that you would come through for us."

Did you get that line? - "we were hoping that you would come through.....for us." What, so I could show up and have free plunder of fine food that was deliciously prepared for hours? So I could feast upon the love that you have had to develop within your family for 58 years?....and all I have to do is show up?...and I am doing this for you? Huh?

I wish I could remember the quote and who said it - but I can't. I can only try to paraphrase. It goes something like this:

It is a mark of success to enter a room and have people genuinely glad that you were there.

In my case - my biggest success was in choosing such good people to be friends with.....the grace they continue to extend to me is far beyond any that I possess...that is for sure.

My hope for all of you - is that you found a place at the table this Thanksgiving. I know many did not. Why I did is only testimony to the grace that God bestows upon me everyday.

Let's not reserve - the feeling of thanksforthereceiving for just one day in late for November. The opportunity to tap into that feeling is something that is there the other 364 days of the year as well. Next Thanksforreceiving is much too far away.

HappyUP!!! Day 294

HappyUP!!! - time with my best friend
Why it happened - the whole clan couldn't come to breakfast
Why it made me happy - we spent about 2 hrs at breakfast...then we went driving around. Just killing time and not doing any of those "oh so important" things that we should/could have been doing. We had a good chat as well.

HappyUP!!! - catching the smile video
Why it happened - I happened to check up on one of my favorite websites
Why it made me happy - look at the previous post. The picture enough is worth it. As I went out in public, I tried to put on that "smile like no one is looking" face. I can have a pretty serious "default" face.....when all I am doing is thinking. There is no question that a smile just puts you in a better mood and creates a better aura.

HappyUP!!! - Deal or No Deal
Why it happened - I was catching some mindless tube
Why it made me happy - they had a cute little gal as a contestant. She was a teacher who left her school to take on graduate school this year. Last year, she took her girls to the national championship in cheerleading. It was moving when the producers showed a special video and cheer the girls had done for their coach.....and then they showed up on the show. They even had the girls be the "models" opening the cases. The coach didn't win a ton of dough but she made good decisions, pocketed some decent coin, and created some excellent TV.

Special HappyUP!!! - Natalie Gulbis is in the final 8 of the ADT Golf Championship tomorrow gunning for a million bucks. Natalie is HOT!!! (I mean as a golfer, of course) She's also a hometown girl. Nobody expects her to win tomorrow so I am hoping she kicks some........girl fanny!

What comes first? The smile or the things to smile about?

OK, time for me to share - one of my favorite websites amongst the gazillions of websites that you can find.

Perhaps good news will never sell - a newspaper or a TV show. This link isn't about good news. It's about thought provoking videos to make one assess their own philosophies.

While the creator, - Nik Askew, has been inconsistent as of late because he has immigrated to a new country, he usually has a new video every Monday morning at 9. It's not a fancy website. This is one where Substance rules over Style.

...just the way I like it.

Check out this weeks entry here

You can also catch the entire library of past videos here

You can thank me for the experience later - really....you can.

HappyUP!!! Day 293

HappyUP!!! - conference call
Why it happened - we debrief after we do a training call
Why it made me happy - I was recognized as "Nutster rocks!" Hey, you put some time into other people and they appreciate it.

HappyUP!!! - meeting with a potential business source
Why it happened - one of my direct reports set it up
Why it made me happy - we had a good meeting. We may do some business. I learned some things.

HappyUP!!! - breakfast
Why it happened - I do that with a direct report on occasion
Why it made me happy - we discussed some critical business strategies....and had some fun