Sunday, November 19, 2006

A Thanksgiving Gift to All of My Travelling Friends


It's that time of year again - you need to pack it up and head out to those friends and relatives. Many of you will actually be staying at homes that aren't yours.

It wouldn't be quite right to be at a hotel - for Thanksgiving, now would it?

(OK....I know some of you are saying, "No, it wouldn't be right but it would be welcome!"

First, I am praying that the owner of the home that you stay in - has the Gift of Hospitality. And, it really is a gift...did you know that. These are the kind of people that have those freshly folded towels....all stacked up...bath, hand, and face....and tied together with nice twine. A brand new bar of fresh soap awaits you...

....and the bed - it looks like it came out of a magazine.

Yes...I pray that all of you will get that.

Now....onward to reality!!! - let's face it. You aren't getting any of that. As a matter of fact, you are an imposition. Don't be surprised to be treated as such. Yes....no matter how wanted you are, you are imposing upon the hosts. You are "the bad guy" so it is very important that you bring something to the table. After all, your hosts are bringing whatever degree of hospitality it is they can muster.

You must bring - your grace and charm. So, with that, let the Nutster bestow upon you a few ideas for things that you can say to your hosts that don't compromise your own level of integrity:

"This house is really a bit of a dive......but you have done some nice things with the mold"

"You know, with someone that has taste doing the decoration, I think this place could have some potential"

"Hiring the blind is an extremely noble thing to do....how long did it take them to paint?"

"Most of the items that you have are quite ugly......but you certainly have a lot of them."

"Wow...that dinner that you made was way closer to edible than last year's. Kudos on the improvement!"

Feel free to use any and all - of the above as you invade the domiciles of your relatives in the next few days.

I do have to warn you - if y0u use any of the above, any of the above, be ready to have an awkward silence returned rather than a "thank you." It happens all the time to me.

The only explanation that I have is that the hosts are so overwhelmed with my degree of graciousness
- that they don't feel deserving of receiving any more of it.

It's the only reason that I can think of - that I haven't been invited to stay at anyone's home this year.





1 comment:

paris parfait said...

Very clever. :)